For many high-net-worth families, wealth planning has long focused on passing assets down the generations. Yet increasingly, a different, and often more delicate, challenge is emerging: managing financial responsibilities upwards, as elderly parents begin to require support with decisions around care, property, and estate structuring.
This is not simply about funding. It is about stewardship of values, choices, and the legacy a parent has worked hard to build. Adult children often find themselves quietly navigating an expanding role: part advocate, part adviser, part emotional anchor.
This guide offers structured insight for individuals in this position, addressing the most common scenarios, risks, and strategies that arise when supporting ageing parents financially.
The first step is often the most sensitive: understanding what your parents have, what they need, and what they may not yet have considered.
Key questions include:
It is important to approach these conversations gently. Financial reluctance is often rooted in a desire not to burden others, but lack of clarity can lead to avoidable complexity later on.
Later-life care can be a significant, and sometimes unpredictable, financial burden. The cost of residential care in the UK can range from £40,000 to £70,000+ per year, depending on needs, location, and whether nursing support is required.
While NHS-funded care is available in some cases, most high-net-worth families will find themselves outside the means-tested support thresholds, and some people will require specialist care, which can often be even more expensive.
Options to consider include:
Clarity on these options can preserve both dignity and decision-making flexibility, ensuring care is chosen based on quality, not cash flow.
For many parents, the home is both their most valuable asset and their most emotionally significant one. Yet it may no longer suit their needs, or it may sit empty as they transition into assisted living or move in with family.
Common scenarios include:
Later-life mortgage products, including Retirement Interest-Only (RIO) and lifetime mortgages, can offer a discreet and dignified solution where capital is needed but selling feels premature.
It is essential that any borrowing is considered alongside the parents’ broader estate plan, and that all parties understand the impact on inheritance, tax, and future eligibility for care support.
Parents may have insurance policies, pensions, and investments set up many years ago, but these may no longer align with their current needs or intentions.
Adult children can support by:
Small changes here can have an outsized impact, particularly where assets are due to pass across multiple generations or family structures are complex.
Supporting a parent financially, even with the best of intentions, can have consequences for your estate, retirement, or gifting ambitions.
It is important to assess:
At Henry Dannell, we often help clients model this intergenerational impact, ensuring that support flows upward without compromising plans that flow downward.
We work with families navigating this shared responsibility, offering insight into lending, structuring, and estate impact, always with discretion and clarity.
If you are entering this stage of life and would value a conversation around how best to support your parents without compromising your financial trajectory, our advisers are here to help you chart that course, calmly and with care.